Thursday, November 29, 2012

Gail Zappa wants you to distribute the Roxy CD

Gail Zappa tries an unorthodox method of spreading her late husband's music. This is how she puts it:
"Dear People of Earth who are interested in anything & everything concerning The Roxy Performances,

So you’ve always dreamt of being a music mogul and running your own record company, huh? But you ask yourself, “How could I get a Real Record Deal?” “I mean,” you say to yourself, “I think I could do this as well as anyone – I have important opinions to share.”  Well here’s your chance to be part of Zappa Music Business History and become an AUTHORIZED DISTRIBUTOR of a Real (REAL!) Live (LIVE!) Zappa Record.  One more time for the world: Recorded by Zappa, Performed by Zappa, featuring some of your favorite Mothers, and Material, AND all under the Roof you’ve been waiting for:  The Roxy!  No ELSEWHERES about it.

What???  It’s True.  We here at Zappa Records are looking for a few good men and women – approximately 1,000 highly motivated, sensitive and discerning individuals – to sign up as Official Independent Distributors of a never-heretofore-released, thoroughly Authentic Zappa Master Recording.  And this is not just any thoroughly authentic Zappa Master Recording either. No, this is the one many of you have been beyond craving.  Please sit down to read this part:  This is the Roxy – the Soundtrack – yes, it is the introductory Soundtrack, the Prequel if you will – the Project/Object of your Dreams.  76 unadulterated minutes of fabulous frenzy await you.  And the opportunity of a life–time: Roxy By Proxy! Should it be determined that you become an Officially Licensed Authorized Zappa RBP Distributor, you can make as many copies of the record as you can possibly distribute – AND exce pt for reporting to us your sales & customers (just like any other record distributor) and paying us the publishing, YOU keep the money. AND you get to collect royalties from what is sold at Barfko-Swill AND you will also be entitled to a special wholesale price available to the OLAZRBPDs (Officially Licensed Authorized Zappa ROXY BY PROXY Distributor) exclusively.

Apart from being Official Release #96 this is a Music Biz First.  How is that you might well ask:  We figured you might like to participate in the wonderment so we have devised a way to let you in behind the scenes of every Artist’s necessity - a music distribution deal – but in this case we’ve cut to the chase. We need to get the record to you so why  shouldn’t you be part of the process?  You can help us help you by helping you help us.

So here’s the deal: for all the information and the ACTUAL LICENSE.

Thanks in advance for your Consideration.



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